While walking Smellie today I saw a pair of morning doves perched on a stump. These are not the kind of birds I see all winter. In a sunny patch near the house, crocuses are just coming up. And while there is still snow on the ground, I feel spring is inevitable. Days are getting longer. The weather is milder. The sun is higher. Soon, perhaps, I'll be sitting with Woody on his sunny front porch sipping a rare bourbon. Perhaps with the thaw will come the ever-so-slightly lessening of viruses. For now, however, outbreaks seem inevitable.

I've no doubt right now the birds are building nests in hidden places around us. Though the earth is still frozen, I've got plans to move a couple-few plants as soon as it softens. When I can, I'm taking longer walks, trying my best not to wipe out on the swaths of ice still coating large sections in the woods. I dream of early summer when buds will be open and smoke from the barbecue will fill my nostrils. I yearn to dine in the screen porch, and walk in the garden holding hands with Calvin. For now, all that is still impossible. He and I are still trapped indoors because of the elements. But getting outside is inevitable.

I wonder if Calvin pines for summer. He stares at the sun, but I wonder if he ever regards a blue sky with clouds passing over. I wonder if he too laments the cold weather. He can't revel in fresh snow or skate on ponds with the others. I wonder if he's ever seen a cardinal. I'm pretty sure he hasn't. In the thaw, the squirrels—which I also don't think he's ever seen though they are abundant—are digging holes unearthing a thousand buried treasures.

Today is day six since Calvin's last seizure. I feel one coming. They're all disagreeable, but slightly easier to take these days mostly because they're so predictable. I just wish they didn't come in spades—or at all—but for now they're inevitable.

I'm proud to have voted for Elizabeth Warren. The ending of her presidential race is regrettable. When will we forsake our biases and fears and elect a female president? I heard of so many women who hedged their bets when it came to casting their votes. We so need diverse and female leadership. The world is not doing so well under the oligarchic patriarchy. In fact, the earth, its flora and fauna are showing acute signs of sickening. I'm dreaming of ministries where at least half of all members are women. It may take time, but, like spring coming, I must hold onto the notion that it, too, is inevitable.

trees photo by michelle lisi

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