on embracing

After Calvin's grand mal seizure yesterday morning (I guess I didn't cross my fingers hard enough) I spent most of the day in his embrace. All he wanted to do was to stay in bed with his arms around my neck. He must have had some sort of stomach bug because ... well, I'll spare you the gory details. Thankfully, though, he was able to keep his seizure medications down, something that when he is sick is always of grave concern to me.

The day had me thinking of how many hours I've spent simply embracing Calvin, as if I am still a lifeline for him as much as he is one for me. I spend a tremendous amount of time tethered to him since he doesn't walk well, doesn't follow instructions well and needs great assistance doing everything. I hesitate to think about the void Calvin would create if he were to disappear, and I wonder, if that were to ever happen, if I'd simply wither away without the life spring of his embrace.

Photos by Michael Kolster and Christy Shake